You don’t always lose yourself
without noticing.
I Watched Myself Change is about the small compromises that gradually become part of who we are. The narrator sees himself agreeing when he wants to refuse, accepting things he once opposed and calling retreat maturity. There is no single event to blame and no dramatic collapse. What troubles him is simpler: he recognised what was happening, understood his own part in it, and kept going anyway.
I noticed it
But I kept going
I said yes when I meant no
I laughed at things I hate
I kept the peace
I kept my place
I watched my edges getting smooth
I watched the anger fade
Not because I grew
Because I caved
I told myself
This is survival
I watched myself change
I watched it happen
Piece by piece
Decision by decision
I watched myself change
And I stayed quiet
Now I don’t recognise
The voice inside it
I defend things I don’t believe
I nod before they finish
Every line I swore I’d never cross
Is now a habit
I wear the calm like borrowed skin
I sell it as maturity
But every compromise
Was just cowardice in me
There was no moment
No disaster
No collapse
Just a thousand quiet choices
I refused to stop
I watched myself change
I noticed it
And I kept going